Digital Fun

I still didn't watch the film Avatar yet but I am absolutely fascinated by the Na'vi race and turning people into that. Thanks to his input and a bit of boredom, I managed to make this avatar version of myself without any avatar generator or anything. It was pretty fun to do. I took parts of the eyes from original avatar posters. Hope ya like it!
I won't tell you how I did it though. :) You can find tutorials online everywhere, but I agree with Ducky when he says that tutorials are a different language. I love tutorials, but I never stick to them, I find them to be guidelines only.
Hey, I look pretty nice with yellow eyes, aye?


Shards of Winter

...And winter breaks, or at least this is what I want to believe. I always found the winter after Holidays to be completely useless and annoying. Winter is beautiful during Holidays, when you've that Christmassy atmosphere and carols (to me at least and don't bore me with antichristian comments, not that you send many comments anyway :P). After Holidays, you have to return to job/school/madness and winter isn't poetic anymore.

It is kind of like in the lyrics of Manic Monday.

So I saw the shards of winter and I held them in my hand and promised I won't reforge the Narsil Sword of Winter. It made me feel powerful this time, in control of the weather.

The weather became me.


Censor the Stars

I love astronomy. It has been one of my fascination domains for a long time and learning about it or simply staring into the night as the light stops to conceal what's beyond has always given me that state of insignifiance that sometimes feels so good.

I recently re-re-re-rewatched a documentary on supernovas and black holes. Black holes, now that's a force that I'd be glad to wield. Although I have been a failure in physics, I always enjoyed this side of dynamics. I was always enticed by black bodies, but black holes are my first love.

Just by reading these, I get shivers:

"Now imagine an object with such an enormous concentration of mass in such a small radius that its escape velocity was greater than the velocity of light. Then, since nothing can go faster than light, nothing can escape the object's gravitational field. Even a beam of light would be pulled back by gravity and would be unable to escape. [...] Near a black hole, this distortion of space is extremely severe and causes black holes to have some very strange properties. In particular, a black hole has something called an 'event horizon.' This is a spherical surface that marks the boundary of the black hole. You can pass in through the horizon, but you can't get back out. In fact, once you've crossed the horizon, you're doomed to move inexorably closer and closer to the 'singularity' at the center of the black hole. The horizon has some very strange geometrical properties. To an observer who is sitting still somewhere far away from the black hole, the horizon seems to be a nice, static, unmoving spherical surface. But once you get close to the horizon, you realize that it has a very large velocity. In fact, it is moving outward at the speed of light! That explains why it is easy to cross the horizon in the inward direction, but impossible to get back out. Since the horizon is moving out at the speed of light, in order to escape back across it, you would have to travel faster than light. You can't go faster than light, and so you can't escape from the black hole. Trying to avoid the center of a black hole once you've crossed the horizon is just like trying to avoid next Thursday. "

But this is the best part and it's a journey I often find myself in, when I dream about it:

"Let's suppose that you get into your spaceship and point it straight towards the million-solar-mass black hole in the center of our galaxy. (Actually, there's some debate about whether our galaxy contains a central black hole, but let's assume it does for the moment.) Starting from a long way away from the black hole, you just turn off your rockets and coast in. What happens?

At first, you don't feel any gravitational forces at all. Since you're in free fall, every part of your body and your spaceship is being pulled in the same way, and so you feel weightless. (This is exactly the same thing that happens to astronauts in Earth orbit: even though both astronauts and space shuttle are being pulled by the Earth's gravity, they don't feel any gravitational force because everything is being pulled in exactly the same way.) As you get closer and closer to the center of the hole, though, you start to feel "tidal" gravitational forces. Imagine that your feet are closer to the center than your head. The gravitational pull gets stronger as you get closer to the center of the hole, so your feet feel a stronger pull than your head does. As a result you feel "stretched." (This force is called a tidal force because it is exactly like the forces that cause tides on earth.) These tidal forces get more and more intense as you get closer to the center, and eventually they will rip you apart.

What do you see as you are falling in? Surprisingly, you don't necessarily see anything particularly interesting. Images of faraway objects may be distorted in strange ways, since the black hole's gravity bends light, but that's about it. In particular, nothing special happens at the moment when you cross the horizon. Even after you've crossed the horizon, you can still see things on the outside: after all, the light from the things on the outside can still reach you. No one on the outside can see you, of course, since the light from you can't escape past the horizon.

Once you've crossed the horizon, in your remaining seven seconds, you might panic and start to fire your rockets in a desperate attempt to avoid the singularity. Unfortunately, it's hopeless, since the singularity lies in your future, and there's no way to avoid your future. In fact, the harder you fire your rockets, the sooner you hit the singularity. It's best just to sit back and enjoy the ride. "

You don't have to read all this, I mostly put this for my own amusement.

But what I have found myself in was a massive star explosion that would've emitted billions of little small stars, flying like a tress of shooting stars, all yellow. Humans had the ability to see this before it happened and they decided that when the event will occur, they will censor it because people weren't ready to view such a spectacle. I was in an abandoned NASA warehouse, trying to figure out a way in which I could stop this censor and let people see the "real deal". That was a dream..a beautiful one. How could people think of censoring the stars?..



And for this, I love you all 17. :)
[people who celebrate their name are excluded from this shitlist]


Fear and Wonder

Does the future scare you?...

Does commitment scare you?...

Do they challenge you?

Be challenged. How can one consider living their life if not by taking a chance, making a difference, changing?

I am one of those people who have put behind the idea of commitment [for a while]. Until not long ago I thought that the main reason for this was fear, but it wasn't. The problem was wonder. I want to be amazed. I want to be blown away and I am no idealist, I know this can happen, the man I want exists, therefore it is not an unreachable ideal.

Fear and wonder are so linked, I say. People often misjudge and fear what they cannot understand, but instead of fearing it and being doomed to a narrow-experienced life, they should embrace wonder instead. Wonder makes everything more colorful. Yeah, I am afraid, too, I am afraid of giving it all and thus I give nothing.

Or you can fear and let life pass by you.
[*The black hair isn't my real hair.]



I got inspired when I had a "color a black and white" photo on vampirefreaks. While most people made the skin color "skin-like" and all natural, I found that boring. I mean, if I have the ability to give any color I like to a person, why would I make it natural? At least in my own little digital world, I like to make the unnatural - natural.

I haven't seen Avatar yet [I will watch it eventually], but I thought that blue would be a good color for a person. I don't know who the girl is [the photo was provided to us by the contest maker], so if anyone knows her, let me know and I'll add her name here.

I am starting to like this. Tomorrow I will look at people and imagine them in colors. I didn't upload it full size, I have a bandwidth and I don't want this photo to eat so much from it. [click photo for blogwise "full" size]



Visit my mother's blog. Check out her photography and drawings, they're great quality. AND be respectful to her or else you'll have to deal with the geek wrath and it is not pretty. :)

Other than that, today was my last exam. I have this incurable shiness to talk to teachers that sometimes only makes me look like a total fool, but it's fine. I made sure to tell them that I am very shy and when they gave me confidence, they realized that this was the reason for which I was so quiet.

But I am treating myself with my digital scrambling, or what others may call "art" and if you want to see it, make an account here and then let me know and I will direct you to my portfolio (that's because I knoooow the business). BUT I know that nobody will do it, so whatever. :) If you use THAT link, visit my stuff and enjoy anything from my portfolio AND I see that you used my referall code, I will make you some very cool stuff for free, so think about it. I've been told that my graphics are good and I also got paid to make, so... :D

Alright, I am going to diminish my ego and just say...see you all later. I was surprised how many people said "let's meet" in the poll (many in the sense of more than half of the 16 users):

I would meet you [maybe], if I knew who you guys are. :P I'm glad you want to meet me, though.